Separating (לפרוש) until she immerses, no touching nor passing objects, the היכר at the table and not drinking from the remainder of her cup, separate beds and bench, the gaze and designated garments, adornment permitted, the forbidden services of affection (pouring her cup, making her bed, pouring water to wash him), the two periods (niddah and ליבון — the 7 נקיים) and the exceptions of illness — a very practical subject, to be learned from the Rav and the moret kalla (Shulchan Aruch, Yoreh De'ah 195 — 17 se'ifim)
נִדָּה, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאֵין לָהּ קֶבַע לְוִסְתָּהּ, חַיָּב אָדָם לִפְרֹשׁ מֵאִשְׁתּוֹ; וְכָל הַדְּבָרִים שֶׁהָאִשָּׁה נִדָּה אֲסוּרָה בָּהֶם — נוֹהֲגִים בָּהּ בֵּין בִּימֵי נִדָּתָהּ בֵּין בִּימֵי לִבּוּנָהּ, עַד שֶׁתִּטְבֹּל. לֹא יִגַּע בָּהּ אֲפִלּוּ בְּאֶצְבַּע קְטַנָּה, וְלֹא יוֹשִׁיט מִיָּדוֹ לְיָדָהּ שׁוּם דָּבָר.
The niddah — as long as she has not immersed — requires the couple to separate (לפרוש); and all the things from which the niddah is forbidden apply both in days of niddah and in days of ליבון (the 7 clean days). He does not touch her even with the little finger, and does not pass any object hand to hand.
Shulchan Aruch, Yoreh De'ah 195:1-2 (summary)LEVEL 01
The vocalized Hebrew text of the 17 se'ifim with a fluent English translation: separating until she immerses, no touching nor passing objects, the היכר at the table and the cup, separate beds, designated garments and permitted adornment, the forbidden services of affection, the two periods (niddah and ליבון) and the exceptions of illness — explained with practical cases, always referring to the Rav and the moret kalla.
📖 StudyLEVEL 02
In-depth pilpul: the nature of the הרחקות (סייג לעריות — of Torah or rabbinic origin), why even a נגיעה שלא כדרך חיבה is forbidden (since נגיעה כדרך תאוה is דאורייתא); the logic of the היכר and the שינוי at the table, the cup and the service; why the same הרחקות apply in ליבון and the קולות of the Rama (Ravia); the criterion of דרך חבה (making the bed / pouring / washing = חבה, טורח = permitted); and the hierarchies of leniency in illness (he ill / she ill / doctor, the link to א״ח פ״ח). חקירות and נפקא מינות.
📖 StudyLEVEL 03
Comparative tables (touch and the object, the table and the cup, the bed and the bench, the service and illness, days of niddah / days of ליבון), golden rules, classic pitfalls (היכר, דרך חבה, נגיעה, pouring) and memorization of the 17 se'ifim grouped into 6 families — always under the guidance of the Rav and the moret kalla.
📖 StudyLEVEL 04
The shitah of the Tzemach Tzedek of Lubavitch and the Chabad mesorah on the הרחקות — a living Chabad domain, presented at the level of principle while referring for conduct to a Chabad Rav —, then the halacha le-ma'aseh according to the Beit Yosef, the Rama, the Shach, the Taz, the Sidrei Tahara, the Chochmat Adam, the Aroch haShulchan and contemporary pesak (Taharat haBayit, Shevet haLevi, Badei haShulchan). Every conclusion refers to the Rav and the moret kalla.
📖 StudyAs long as the woman is a niddah and has not yet immersed, the couple must separate (לפרוש). The Shulchan Aruch (YD 195) details the everyday הרחקות: not touching, even with the little finger, and not passing an object hand to hand (even by throwing it); at the table, eating only with a היכר — something that separates the dishes (bread, a jug) or each on a separate tablecloth; not drinking from the remainder of her cup; sleeping in separate beds; and he does not pour a drink for her nor send her a cup designated for her. These are practical halachot one learns precisely from a Rav and a moret kalla.
All these הרחקות apply both during the days of niddah and during the days of ליבון — the שבעה נקיים (seven clean days) — with no difference between one who sees actual blood (רואה) and a mere כתם, since as long as she has not immersed she retains her status. The Rama brings a יש אומרים that is lenient in the days of ליבון on one point (such as eating from a single dish), but the basic custom remains strict. What distinguishes, or does not distinguish, the two periods is learned from the Rav and the moret kalla, who transmit the couple's exact custom.
Yes. The Shulchan Aruch teaches that it was permitted, with difficulty (בקושי התירו), for the niddah to adorn herself (כחל ופרכוס) during her days, so that she does not become repulsive to her husband (שלא תתגנה על בעלה). On the other hand, one designates for her particular garments for her niddah days, so that both remember her status, and the modesty of the gaze is preserved. This is the spirit of the siman: to maintain the affection and dignity of the home while preserving the separation. The practical contours are settled with the Rav and the moret kalla.
The siman (se'ifim 15-17) deals with the exceptions of illness. If the husband is ill and has no one else to serve him, his niddah wife may care for him, guarding against the services of affection (pouring him a drink, making his bed in his presence). If she is ill and a niddah, he does not touch her to serve her — and a יש אומרים is brought that permits it in the absence of any other helper. If the husband is a doctor, he is forbidden to take the pulse of his niddah wife, except in danger (סכנה) and the absence of another doctor. All these are she'elot to be asked, without delay, of the Rav — and the medical situation, of the physician.