Siman ע״א · The mourner and those occupied with the dead
דין אבל והעוסקים במת — one whose relative has died and whom he must mourn (אונן) is exempt from the ק״ש and the תפילה, even if the burial is not his charge ; the watcher of the dead and the gravedigger are exempt (עוסק במצוה) ; and it is forbidden to recite the ק״ש near the deceased
סימן ע״א · ז׳ סעיפים
דין אבל והעוסקים במת
🌱 Introductory level · Beginners
✦ ❖ ✦
This siman teaches the status of the אונן (the mourner before burial) and of those עוסקים במת: the onen is פטור מקריאת שמע ומתפילה, even if the burial is not his charge, and even if he wishes to be stringent אינו רשאי (because of כבוד המת) ; the distinction between a weekday and Shabbat ; המשמר את המת (the one who watches the deceased) and החופר קבר (the gravedigger), exempt because עוסק במצוה ; and the ban on reciting the ק״ש תוך ד׳ אמות של מת (לועג לרש). Hebrew text, fluent English translation and explanation of the ז׳ seifim, with a section of practical cases.
Compiled by: רב יוסף חיים סממה DAAT · daattorah.com
Our Sages taught (ברכות י״ז:): מי שמתו מוטל לפניו — פטור מקריאת שמע ומן התפילה — one whose dead lies before him is exempt from the ק״ש and from the תפילה, for his heart is taken up with the needs of the deceased, out of כבוד המת. And they taught too (סוכה כ״ה.): העוסק במצוה פטור מן המצוה — one occupied with a mitsva is exempt from another. From these two principles the whole siman flows. We study here at the level of principle; for personal conduct, one refers to the custom and to the ruling of the Rav.
📑 Study outline
A.The ז׳ seifim — the אונן (séif 1), בחול ובשבת ויום טוב (séif 2), המשמר את המת (séif 3-4), החופר קבר (séif 5-6), תוך ד׳ אמות של מת (séif 7)
1.Practical case — the onen who wishes to be stringent and recite
2.Practical case — the one who watches the dead or digs the grave
3.Practical case — reciting the ק״ש near the deceased or in a cemetery
+Comprehension questions and going further
A. The mourner and those occupied with the dead — the ז׳ seifim
אָבֵל וְהָעוֹסְקִים בַּמֵּת — the mourner and those occupied with the dead — two ideas govern the siman. The אונן (one whose relative has died and is not yet buried) is exempt from the ק״ש and the תפילה because of כבוד המת: his heart must remain free for the needs of the deceased. And those actively occupied with the burial — המשמר את המת and החופר קבר — are exempt because העוסק במצוה פטור מן המצוה. Hence too the ban on reciting the ק״ש תוך ד׳ אמות של מת, because of לועג לרש.
Séif 1 — the אונן: exempt from the ק״ש and the תפילה
מי שמת לו מת שהוא חייב להתאבל עליו, אפילו אינו מוטל עליו לקברו — פטור מקריאת שמע ומתפילה; ואפילו אם רוצה להחמיר על עצמו ולקרות אינו רשאי. ואם יש לו מי שישתדל בשבילו בצרכי קבורה ורצה להחמיר על עצמו ולקרות — אין מוחין בידו.
Séif 1: one whose relative has died and whom he is bound to mourn — even if the burial is not his own charge (אינו מוטל עליו לקברו) — is exempt from the ק״ש and the תפילה; and even if he wishes to be stringent upon himself and recite, he is not permitted to (אינו רשאי). But if he has someone who attends for him to the needs of the burial and he wishes to be stringent and recite, we do not protest against him (אין מוחין בידו).
The אונן (the mourner before burial) is exempt — not only for lack of time, but because of כבוד המת: his heart must be free to attend to the deceased. This is why, even if he wishes to recite, אינו רשאי — he is not permitted. The only exception: if someone else is already attending to the burial, we do not stop him from being stringent (אין מוחין בידו) [see Yoreh Deah 341].
Séif 2 — בחול, בשבת ויום טוב
במה דברים אמורים בחול, אבל בשבת חייב כל היום עד הערב אם מחשיך על התחום להתעסק בצרכי קבורה; ואם אינו מחשיך על התחום חייב גם לעת ערב. ויום טוב שני דינו כחול; ויום טוב ראשון, אם רוצה לקוברו בו ביום על ידי נכרים דינו כחול, ואם אינו רוצה לקוברו בו ביום דינו כשבת.
Séif 2: in what case is this said? On a weekday (בחול); but on Shabbat he is obligated (חייב) all day until evening, if he waits until night at the תחום boundary to busy himself with the burial needs [right after Shabbat]; and if he is not waiting at the boundary, he is obligated also toward evening. The second day of Yom Tov — its rule is like a weekday; and the first day of Yom Tov: if he wishes to bury him that day by means of non-Jews (נכרים), its rule is like a weekday, and if he does not wish to bury him that day, its rule is like Shabbat.
On Shabbat aninut does not apply (burial cannot be attended to), so he is obligated in the mitsvot all day — unless he waits at the תחום to act immediately after Shabbat. The second day of Yom Tov is like a weekday, and the first day depends on whether he wishes to bury the same day על ידי נכרים.
Séif 3 — המשמר את המת: the watcher of the dead
המשמר את המת, אפילו אינו מתו — פטור.
Séif 3: the one who watches the deceased (המשמר את המת), even if it is not his own dead — is exempt.
The watcher of the dead is exempt, even if the deceased is nothing to him: because he is עוסק במצוה — occupied with a mitsva (guarding and honouring the dead), and העוסק במצוה פטור מן המצוה. Here the reason is not the כבוד המת of a mourner, but the very occupation with the mitsva.
Séif 4 — שנים משמרים: two watchers
היו שנים משמרים — זה משמר וזה קורא, ואחר כך משמר זה וקורא זה.
Séif 4: if there were two watching — this one watches and that one recites, and afterwards this one watches and that one recites.
When there are two, the exemption is only for the one actually occupied: one watches and the other recites the ק״ש, then they switch. Thus the watch is never interrupted and each fulfils the ק״ש in turn.
Séif 5 — החופר קבר: the gravedigger
החופר קבר למת — פטור.
Séif 5: the one who digs a grave for the deceased (החופר קבר למת) — is exempt.
Like the watcher, the gravedigger is exempt, for he is עוסק במצוה — occupied with the needs of the burial. As long as he is engaged in the work, the Torah does not burden him to turn to another mitsva.
Séif 6 — שנים חופרים: several gravediggers
היו שנים או יותר חופרים, כל הצריכים לצרכי החפירה בבת אחת — פטורים; ואם יש נוספים, נשמטים וקורין וחוזרין אלו ומתעסקים, והאחרים נשמטים וקורין.
Séif 6: if there were two or more digging, all those needed for the digging at one time — are exempt; and if there are additional ones, they slip away, recite, and return, while these busy themselves, and the others slip away and recite.
Only those needed at one time for the work are exempt. Those who are extra (נוספים) slip away one after another, recite the ק״ש and return to dig, while others slip away — so that all end up reciting without the digging ever stopping [see Yoreh Deah 365].
Séif 7 — תוך ד׳ אמות של מת: reciting near the deceased
אסור לקרות קריאת שמע תוך ד׳ אמות של מת או בבית הקברות, ואם קרא — לא יצא.
Séif 7: it is forbidden to recite the ק״ש within the four cubits (ד׳ אמות) of the deceased or in a cemetery, and if he recited — he has not fulfilled his obligation (לא יצא).
One does not recite the ק״ש within four cubits of a corpse nor in a cemetery, because of לועג לרש — it would be "mocking the poor", that is the deceased who can no longer perform the mitsvot. And more than that: אם קרא לא יצא — if he recited, he has not fulfilled his obligation and must recite again elsewhere.
The siman in one sentence: the אונן (before burial) is exempt from the ק״ש and the תפילה and even if stringent אינו רשאי (כבוד המת), unless another attends to the burial (אין מוחין) ; on a weekday he is exempt, but on Shabbat חייב ; the watcher and the gravedigger are exempt because עוסק במצוה ; and it is forbidden to recite the ק״ש תוך ד׳ אמות של מת or in a cemetery — קרא לא יצא.
Practical cases
Case 1 — The onen who wishes to be stringent
Situation: a relative has just died and is not yet buried; the onen nonetheless wishes to recite the ק״ש. May he?
Conduct: no — the onen is exempt, and even if he wishes to be stringent אינו רשאי, because of כבוד המת; nor does he say the ברכות. Exception: if someone else is already attending to the burial and he insists on reciting, אין מוחין בידו — we do not stop him. For the practical application (and resuming after the burial), one follows one's Rav.
Case 2 — Watching the dead or digging the grave
Situation: he watches a corpse (even one that is nothing to him), or takes part in digging the grave. Must he interrupt to recite the ק״ש?
Conduct: as long as he is occupied with the mitsva (המשמר, החופר), he is exempt: העוסק במצוה פטור מן המצוה. If there are two watching — one watches and one recites, then they switch; and if there are extra gravediggers, they slip away one after another to recite. For the details, one follows one's Rav.
Case 3 — Reciting near the deceased or in a cemetery
Situation: he is within four cubits of a corpse, or in a cemetery, and the time for the ק״ש is pressing. May he recite there?
Conduct: no — אסור לקרות תוך ד׳ אמות של מת or in a cemetery, because of לועג לרש. Moreover, אם קרא לא יצא: even if he recited, he has not fulfilled his obligation and must recite again at a proper distance. For the exact measure of the ד׳ אמות and the borderline cases, one follows one's Rav.
Comprehension questions
Check your understanding:
Why is the אונן exempt from the ק״ש, and whence is it learned (séif 1)?
Why, even if he wishes to be stringent, is the onen אינו רשאי — and when is אין מוחין בידו?
Why on Shabbat is the mourner חייב whereas on a weekday he is exempt (séif 2)?
Why are המשמר את המת and החופר קבר exempt, and which principle explains it (séifim 3-6)?
Why is it forbidden to recite תוך ד׳ אמות של מת, and what is the law אם קרא (séif 7)?
Going further
If you wish to deepen this siman:
📚 Level 2 — Lamdan: for the pilpoul — אנינות דאורייתא או דרבנן, ומי שמתו מוטל לפניו פטור (ברכות י״ז:-י״ח.) ; יסוד הפטור — משום כבוד המת או משום עוסק במצוה ; העוסק במצוה פטור מן המצוה (סוכה כ״ה.) במשמר ובחופר, ולועג לרש תוך ד׳ אמות
✨ Level 3 — Synthesis: for review and quick memorization
👑 Level 4 — Daat HaRav (the Alter Rebbe): the shitah of the Shulchan Aroukh HaRav — האונן, בחול ובשבת, המשמר והחופר, ולועג לרש תוך ד׳ אמות