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DAAT · LEVEL 1 — INTRODUCTION

Siman קס״ט · The attendant (shamash) at the meal

דין שמש הסעודה — of any fragrant, desired dish one gives the attendant a portion at once, a מדת חסידות to give from every kind מפני עגמת נפש ; one gives food only to one who will bless ; and the attendant recites בורא פרי הגפן over each cup because he is כנמלך
סימן קס״ט · ג׳ סעיפים
דין שמש הסעודה
🌱 Introductory level · מתחילים
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This siman teaches how to conduct oneself toward the attendant (shamash) who serves at the meal: one gives him at once a portion from every dish that is fragrant and desired (מִדַּת חֲסִידוּת), to spare him the distress (עָגְמַת נֶפֶשׁ) of watching others eat ; one gives bread only to one who washed his hands, and one gives food only to מי שיודע שיברך (one who will bless) ; and the attendant's blessings — he blesses over each cup (כנמלך). Hebrew text, fluent English translation and explanation of the ג׳ seifim, with a section of practical cases.

Topic: The meal's attendant — נתינה לשמש, למי שיודע שיברך, ברכות השמש
Source: שולחן ערוך אורח חיים סימן קס״ט · ג׳ סעיפים

Compiled by: רב יוסף חיים סממה
DAAT · daattorah.com

After the blessing on bread and the kinds of bread (simanim 166-168), the Choulhan Aroukh devotes a short siman to a fine demand of the table: how one treats the attendant (שמש) who serves at the meal. Three seifim: what one gives him (from every dish, מפני עגמת נפש), to whom one may give food (to one who will bless), and how the attendant recites his blessings. We study here at the level of principle; for personal conduct, one refers to the custom and to the ruling of the Rav.

📑 Study outline

A. נתינה לשמש (seif 1) — giving the attendant from every dish, and its limits
B. למי נותנים לאכול (seif 2) — to whom one gives food
C. ברכות השמש (seif 3) — the attendant's blessings and the zimun
1-2. Practical cases and comprehension questions

A. נתינה לשמש — giving the attendant from every dish

שַׁמָּשׁ — the attendant who serves the guests during the meal (the one who brings the dishes and pours the wine). This siman sets the conduct toward him: what one gives him, when, and under what condition; then, more broadly, to whom one may give food, and how the attendant himself recites his blessings.

Seif 1 — כל דבר שיש לו ריח: giving from every dish, מפני עגמת נפש

כל דבר שמביאין לפני האדם שיש לו ריח והאדם תאב לו צריך ליתן ממנו לשמש מיד ומדת חסידות הוא ליתן לו מיד מכל מין ומין ולא יתן לו כל זמן שהכוס בידו או ביד ב״ה [ודוקא לשמש אבל לאחר שבסעודה מותר ליתן בכי האי גונא] הר״י ס״פ אלו דברים ואסור ליתן לו פרוסת פת אא״כ יודע בו שנטל ידיו.
Seif 1: of any dish that is brought before a person, that has a [pleasant] fragrance and that the person desires, one must give a portion at once to the attendant (shamash) ; and it is a pious practice (מדת חסידות) to give him at once from every kind. But one does not give to him while the cup [of wine] is in his hand or in the hand of the host. Gloss of the Rama: and this applies specifically to the attendant, but to another guest at the meal it is permitted to give in such a case — Rabbenu Yona, end of the chapter "Elu Devarim." And it is forbidden to give him a piece of bread unless one knows that he has washed his hands.
Giving from every dish. When a fragrant, coveted dish arrives, one gives the attendant a portion at once, and it is a מדת חסידות to give him from every kind — to spare him the distress (עגמת נפש) of watching others eat while receiving nothing. One does not give to him while the cup is in hand (his own or the host's), and one gives him bread only if one knows that he has washed his hands (נטל ידיו).

B. למי נותנים לאכול — to whom one gives food

Seif 2 — לא יתן לאכול אלא למי שיודע בו שיברך

לא יתן לאכול אלא למי שיודע בו שיברך. ויש מקילין אם נותן לעני בתורת צדקה [הר״י ס״פ אלו דברים].
Seif 2: one gives food only to one whom one knows will recite the blessing. Gloss of the Rama: and some are lenient if one gives to a poor person as charity [Rabbenu Yona, end of the chapter "Elu Devarim"].
Not enabling a wrong. One gives food only to one whom one knows will bless — so as not to be complicit with someone who would eat without a blessing ("do not place a stumbling block before the blind"). The Rama cites lenient views when one gives to a poor person as charity: there the duty of tsedaka prevails, and one may give even without that certainty.

C. ברכות השמש — the attendant's blessings

Seif 3 — השמש מברך על כל כוס: כנמלך and the zimun

השמש מברך בורא פרי הגפן על כל כוס וכוס שיתנו לו לפי שהוא כנמלך וברכה אחרונה אינו מברך אלא לבסוף ואינו צריך לברך על כל פרוסה ופרוסה אם יש אדם חשוב בסעודה שיודע שיתנו לו כל צרכו מפת ואם אין אדם חשוב בסעודה צריך לברך על כל פרוסה ופרוסה כמו על היין. הגה שנים שהיו אוכלין ביחד השמש אוכל עמהם בלא נטילת רשות כדי שיצטרפו לזמון [וע״ל סי׳ ק״ע סכ״א].
Seif 3: the attendant recites "בורא פרי הגפן" over each and every cup that is given to him, because he is like one who did not count on it (כנמלך) ; but the final blessing (berakha aharona) he recites only at the end. And he need not bless over each piece of bread if there is an important person (אדם חשוב) at the meal, since he knows they will give him all the bread he needs ; but if there is no important person at the meal, he must bless over each piece, just as over the wine. Gloss of the Rama: two who were eating together — the attendant eats with them without asking permission, so that they may join for the zimun [see above, siman 170:21].
Blessing over each cup. The attendant never knows whether he will be given more to drink: each cup is therefore, for him, unexpected (כנמלך), and he recites the בורא פרי הגפן each time ; the berakha aharona, however, is said once at the end. For bread, it depends on the table: if there is an אדם חשוב (important person) — since he will surely be given all his bread — he need not re-bless over each piece ; otherwise, he blesses over each piece as over the wine. Finally the Rama: two guests eating together may let the attendant eat with them without permission, so as to form the zimun of three.
The siman in one sentence: toward the attendant (שמש) there is a demand of delicacy — to give him at once from every dish that is fragrant (מדת חסידות, מפני עגמת נפש), not while the cup is in hand, nor bread without knowing he washed his hands ; one gives food only to מי שיודע שיברך (with leniency for a poor person בתורת צדקה) ; and the attendant blesses over each cup (כנמלך), the berakha aharona at the end, and may join the zimun.

Practical cases

Case 1 — Serving at table with delicacy

Situation: a server (or a helper) serves the meal at my home. Should I think of him while the guests eat?
Conduct: yes — it is a מדת חסידות to give him at once a portion from every dish that is fragrant and appetizing (מכל מין ומין), to spare him the עגמת נפש of watching others eat. One does not serve him while he is holding the cup, and one gives him bread only if one knows he has washed his hands. For the concrete manner, one follows one's Rav.

Case 2 — To whom one gives food, and the attendant's blessings

Situation: may I offer food to someone I do not know will bless? And the server — must he bless on every cup?
Conduct: in principle one gives food only to one who will bless (seif 2) ; but for a poor person, as tsedaka, there are lenient views. The attendant recites the בורא פרי הגפן over each cup he is given (for he is כנמלך) and the berakha aharona at the end ; over bread, only if no אדם חשוב is present. For the details, one follows one's Rav.

Comprehension questions

Check your understanding:
  1. What must be given to the attendant, and why (what is the reason, עגמת נפש) — seif 1?
  2. Under what two conditions does one not give to the attendant (the cup, the bread) — seif 1?
  3. To whom may one give food, and what is the leniency for a poor person (seif 2)?
  4. Why does the attendant bless over each cup (כנמלך), and when only over bread (seif 3)?

Going further

If you wish to deepen this siman:
Continue to the next simanSiman 170 →
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DAAT · רב יוסף חיים סממה

סימן קס״ט · ג׳ סעיפים · Level 1 — Introduction
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